When my daughter went through the “terrible twos” I felt as
though her naughty behaviors would never cease. Once she finally lifted her
head from the mire of limit pushing and outbursts and flashed her sweet little
smile with no ulterior motives, I knew that when all seasoned parents had
consistently told me, “it was just a phase,” they were right.
After my daughter got out of the “terrible twos” my son
quickly took her place with such fierceness I almost began to loose the
conviction that his unpleasant behaviors were indeed temporary. My sweet,
innocent, lovable little boy had turned into a complete terror that was (and
still is) easily encouraged by his sister’s easy humor.
The fact that my daughter has pretty much grown out of the
“testing” phase is encouraging, and I know my son will eventually figure out
what his (and my) limits are. But I have come to realize another encouraging
point behind my son’s outbursts: his pushing the (my) limits is only a fraction
of all the limits he will attempt to push when he grows up.
As a parent, I often consider my children’s imperfect
conduct as flat out irritating and exceedingly trying on my patience. But in
reality, who doesn’t push their limits every once in a while? True, young
children seem to be on a 24/7 mission of pushing every button mom or dad has,
and performing every appalling deed, so it can be a bit overwhelming. But if
you think about it, we as adults have so many more venues where we can express
our dissents, but our children have such a much smaller sphere of influence
that we lucky ones that happen to inhabit that sphere feel constantly attacked.
Ultimately, the “terrible twos” is not just a phase. It’s
definitely a more overbearing part of childhood that can really push parents to
their breaking points, but though our kids learn to restrain their pushing
(hopefully), they will never completely stop. And honestly, do we truly want
them to completely stop pushing the limits, propelling past their comfort
zones, reaching to the stars? Each person they test, whether it’s their parent,
a friend, or a complete stranger, is just another person who either does or
does not earn their respect and trust.
Of course, I AM writing this while all of my children are
asleep and the whining and crying and screaming and fighting and tantrums have
all been quieted for the night, so I can easily look upon these “terrible twos”
with much more rational clarity than I do when I’m in the direct line of fire. ツ
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