1-2-3 Magic!

I am no stranger to unruly children. And being the huge book worm that I am, I have a good number of self-help books on children and discipline, most of which have actually been very beneficial in not only helping me manage my children better but also in putting me more at ease as a mother. The last book I read was suggested to me by a friend (which is how I come across most of my self-help books): 1-2-3 Magic by Thomas W. Phelan. In essence, I discovered the magic of counting.

I’ll admit this is in no way a new idea. It just wasn’t one I personally was using. But it has worked wonders with my children, and my sanity. Instead of distressing myself over my children’s “selective hearing” or experiencing the anxiety I would get after repeatedly explaining to my children what they were doing wrong and why it’s wrong, I have now settled on just counting, and if they are unable to correct their behavior by the count of three (a.k.a. the third warning), the consequence is time out. My children know the behaviors that are inappropriate (yes, my children even know the word “inappropriate”), so when I tell them, “That’s one!” they know what I’m talking about and they can then either choose to discontinue that behavior or set themselves up for a second warning, easy as that.

Let me tell you, this whole counting business is pretty fantastic. It keeps the punishments consistent and predictable, and the best part is it keeps my sanity in check. The irritation that inevitably arises from continually hounding my children about a particular behavior, like whining, doesn’t even show its head when I use the counting method. It’s simply magical!!